November 6, 1997 "And it's three hits..." What's New Got this in the mail today from my brother in law. Hoo Hoo Hoo!!! — Luke: "You fought in the clone wars?" Ben: "I was once a Jedi Knight the same as your father." Luke: "My father didn't fight in the wars. He was a navigator on a spice freighter." Ben: "That's what your Uncle told you. He didn't hold with your father's ideals. He thought he should stay home. Not gotten involved." Luke: "I wish I had known him." Ben: "He was a cunning warrior, and the best star pilot in the galaxy. I understand you've become quite a good pilot yourself And he was a good friend. For over a thousand years the Jedi Knight protected the galaxy. Before the dark times. Before the Empire." Luke: "How did my father die?" Ben: "A young Jedi Knight named Darth Vader, who was a pupil of mine until he turned to evil, helped the Emperor hunt down and destroy the Jedi Knights. He betrayed and murdered your father. Vader was seduced by the Dark Side of the Force." Luke: "The Force?" Ben: "Yes, the Force is what gives a Jedi Knight his power. It's an energy field created by all living things. It surrounds us. Penetrates us. Binds the galaxy together. Which reminds me.Your father wanted you to have this when you were old enough, but your Uncle wouldn't allow. He thought you'd follow old Obi-Wan on some idealistic crusade." Luke: "What is it?" Ben: "It a lightsaber. The weapon of a Jedi Knight. Not as random or clumsy as a blaster. An elegant weapon for a more civilized age." Now the interpretation. Luke: "You were in the Greek System?." Ben: "I was once a Frat Guy the same as your father." Luke: "My father didn't belong to a frat. He was a tool, an RA in the dorms for four years." Ben: "That's what your mother told you. She didn't hold with your father's ideals. She thought he should stay home. Not drink until four in the morning and then piss on things." Luke: "I wish I had known him, when he could drink." Ben: "He was a cunning partier, and the best boat-racer in the house. And he was a good brother. I understand you've become quite a booze hound yourself. For over five years he got so curbed he could hardly function. Before the dark times. Before, his skirt." Luke: "How did my father become a lame ass?" Ben: "A young chick, namely your mother, who was pretty cool herself until she turned to evil, helped other women hunt down and destroy the coolness in men. She civilized and murdered the brother who was once your father. Your mother was pissed off by the dark side of Beer" Luke: "Beer?" Ben: [smiles] "Yes, Beer is what gives a frat guy his power.It's a beverage created by hops and barley...and shit like that. It messes us up. Gives us beer goggles. And lets us yell stuff like "penis" in bars everywhere. Which reminds me. Your father wanted you to have this when you were old enough, but your Mother wouldn't allow it. He thought you'd follow some Frat Brother on some binge drinking crusade." Luke: "What is it?" Ben: "Your father's beer-bong. The weapon of a Frat Guy. Not as random or clumsy as a shot glass. An elegant weapon for a less civilized age..." What's On My Mind Blackness. LATER.... GRIEF - IF WE AVOID IT WILL IT GO AWAY? Grief is as old as mankind but is one of the most neglected of human problems. As we become aware of this neglect, we come to realize the enormous cost that it has been to the individual, to the families and to society, in terms of pain and suffering because we have neglected the healing of grief. Essential to a grieving person is to have at least one person who will allow them, give them permission to grieve. Some people can turn to a friend or to a family member. Some find a support group that will allow one to be the way one needs to be at the present as they work through their grief. Dealing appropriately with grief is important in helping to preserve healthy individuals and nurturing families, to avoid destroying bodies and their psyche, their marriages and their relationships. You can postpone grief but you cannot avoid it. As other stresses come along, one becomes less able to cope if one has other unresolved grief. It requires a great deal of energy to avoid grief and robs one of energy for creative expression in relating to other people and in living a fulfilling life. It limits one's life potential. Suppressing grief keeps one in a continual state of stress and shock, unable to move from it. Our body feels the effects of it in ailments. Our emotional life suffers. Our spiritual life suffers. We say that the person is "stuck in grief". When a person faces his grief, allows his feeling to come, speaks of his grief, allows its expression, it is then that the focus is to move from death and dying and to promote life and living. Fr. Dunstan died yesterday. He was a righteous dude. I'll miss him. I got the above from a site on the web. It isn't for me about Dunstan, it's about me. See? It's all about me. Selfish bastard no? :-) I asked to be taken off the job I was doing and given something less stressful. I didn't go in to work yesterday. I couldn't. I was dressed and ready but couldn't get out the door. I'd go to it and turn back. I was too flipped out about not being able to do what I knew needed to be done at work and that I wasn't measuring up to anyone's needs. It's now 2.49A on Friday and I have to go in today. Gotta see what's going on at the ranch if nothing else. This can't the state of affairs much longer. I have got to get back in harness if at all possible. Hospitalization ain't the answer cause they can't help me. The meds work okay but they don't get me going. I just have to tough it out and keep on plodding. Damn tough to plod in glue ya know... I think I'm playing a game with myself here. A very old game. Be Joyous! , despite reports to the contrary, has NOT been shown to produce acute paranoia in speckled Geckos. <nothing right now> "to the heart son." Copyright ©1996, 1997 A.T.Green. All Rights Reserved.